Pat Gunn (dachte) wrote,
Pat Gunn

President dumbass

Once upon a time, there was a profoundly stupid man from anoil family. He rode through college on the family name,managing only to get a business degree. Eventually, heentered politics, again riding on the family name, andmanaged to become one of the very rarest of presidents thatgot into office without having a majority of the popular vote.Understanding little domestic policy, and even less foreignpolicy, he surrounded himself by people afraid of nude statues, oilfriends, and business criminals. Alas, without anything to pushthe public, all he could do was slow damage to the country. Then,one day, terrorists blew up some landmarks. This man was delighted --it meant he could start attacking other countries. And attack othercountries he did. First, Afghanistan, where the head of the terroristswas hanging out. Next, Iraq, which really didn't have anything to dowith this group of terrorists, but which was a family tradition. Inpreparing to attack Iraq, he demanded weapons inspectors go findweapons his dad demanded be banned. After much fuss, weapons inspectorswere sent in. They looked, and looked, and didn't find anything. Thisman really really wanted war though, so he decided that the weaponsinspectors wern't that important anyhow. Others in the U.N., includingFrance, got mad that this man would change his mind like this, and dowar, but, sadly, they wern't willing to try to stop him. He sent hisarmy to the far-away country of Iraq, destroyed their army, and startedraising his flag all over the place, taking it down a bit afterwards, justlong enough to show the Iraqis that they were crushed and should feelshame. It didn't take long, with his billions of dollars into research,despite the Iraqis who fought much harder than expected to keep him out.Alas, when the war was completely over, the Iraqis were mad anyhow -- theydidn't want the man's people there. Worse, they wanted to set up an evenworse government based on barbaric religious laws that would make many people,especially women, much worse off than in old Iraq. What would this man do?Not only that, the man decided to be ungrateful to an old friend whowas trying to tell him that he was making a mistake.

What's the end to this story? Time will tell.

Tags: politics

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