Depending on how I look it at, that was either a prety good or a prettybad trip to Columbus. I could say that it wasn't really what I was expecting,but I'm not really sure what I was expecting. My mental soundtrack for thetrip was set some music I've had for a long time that I haven't listened toever. I recently learned that I've been unduly prejudiced against remixmusic -- I went to Beborn Beton's website, and downloadedsome 30-second samples I liked, which were different versions of songs Ihave on my "Songs From Another World" CD, and was unhappy that only that CDis available in the United States (yes, I could import, and I've been thinkingof getting an account on www.amazon.de to get European musicand books that don't make it over here..). Anyhow, while browsing their site,I learned that they were actually official remixes, and some of them areactually already present on the second CD (which I have but have ignored)from that 2-cd set. So.. after I got home, I ripped that CD to OGG, andwhile a lot of the songs are remixes of the kind I dislike, some of themare quite good. I think for my tastes, a good remix must not mess with themelody nor change the overall song flow too much. On the off chance, dearreader, that you have the CD, the songs that I like from it are:
- Dr Channard (Funker Vogt Remix)
- Peach (DJ Ram Breath Away Mix)
- Too Emotional (DJ Ram Sensuality Edit)
- Another World (Ephemeral Rage) - different, but well done
In almost all of those though, they have an annoying remix intro which is dull.I'm likely to edit them to chop out the intro so when I put them on mix CDs,I won't need to suffer those parts. New music is always a good thing forcar trips..
So, the trip there was pretty easy, although a general theme of the trip isthat it was ill-planned and kind of lonely. I wasn't able to find anyone toeat dinner with me, so I had Veggie Bento at the former Insomnia site. Iwish there were a Bento place around here.. hmm.. maybe there is. AfterwardsI swung by Aug's place, and tried to visit with people, but they were busywith organizing stuff.. so I wandered around for awhile and eventually went toOutland.. which was pretty dead. I later found out that it's midterms week atOSU, which probably contributed to the poor turnout, but at least one of myfriends, TimW, was there.. we left around 2am to grab some food at HoundDogspizza. He moved away from Columbus too, so there was much reminiscing. Ithen spent the night at my sisters' place.. which felt almost like I was backin my parents place in Brecksville -- they're rooming with other Brecksvillefolk, so their place is all decorated and souped up. I didn't sleep verywell -- it was comfortable, but I had bad dreams (in these times, that's notat all surprising..). After I woke up and hung with them for awhile, I went andhad lunch with Lorie -- we had a lot to catch up on.. she and her life havegone through a lot of changes, and she's getting ready to depart Columbus..seems that everyone is.. None of the people I hoped to hang out with werefree, so I drove around for awhile and eventually decided to go shopping --that's one of the high points of Columbus, especially compared to Pittsburgh..I swung by Computer Success, and was impressed at the variety in machine casesavailable now.. they had their usual mix of cheap generics and other things, andthen visited Micro Centre.. I was very tempted by their very small cases -- Ithink I might ditch the 'normal desktop' idea, but get another non-laptop systemin one of the 'small cube' form factors, hooking it to my TV to play DVDs andother media as well as using it as a download centre (running bittorrent andthe like). I might get a new TV first if I do that. I also was tempted by astandalone DVD recorder that promised to write things from VCR to DVD withouta computer (my VCR is unreliable).. Instead, I got a cheap but nice papershredder. I've always wanted one -- I keep getting credit card offers in themail that are scarily easy to activate, and I don't like just throwing themaway. On the way out of that shopping complex, I was going to stop by thepet shelter where I volunteered back when I lived in Columbus (and where,years earlier, Martha and I got Wally), and donate some money.. butthe place where it was is now just empty space for rent. It left me feelingkind of sad.
"I'm sorry - I did upset
You didn't get the story
I wrote you love-letters instead
I didn't mean to hurt you
Maybe we are too emotional
Too much heart too hard to handle"
-- Beborn Beton, "Too Emotional"
I couldn't remember where the Verizon Store was where I originally got myphone, but I passed another one on the way to the Sawmill area, and while allthe signs on the door disagreed on if they were open, there were somepeople there, the present owner of the store as well as some friends. It didn'treally feel very corporate.. and with the rain outside it felt like a tent innature, people just existing there, watching the outdoors and not reallythinking about anything. It was kind of nice. Eventually the guy got off thephone, I asked if he had the means to repair my long-broken phone holster, andhe recognized the make of the phone, went back and brought out a big box ofthings for my phone, and let me scoop out what I wanted. I got a spare batteryand a new holster, for free. Nice. I guess that's the nice thing about havingan old phone -- it's hard to find parts, but when you do, the owners aregenerally keen to get rid of them. I went on to Meijer, but didn't buy anythingthere -- and felt kind of empty for having made the trip. I wonder if I justwanted the comfort of going through the routines of a Meijer trip. I did passa rare sign on the way back -- a green circle, no slash, with a U-turn arrowin the middle, telling me that, unlike Ohio Traffic law generally, a U-turnis ok there. I wish I had had my camera -- it would've been a cool picture.
I hurried back to the campus area -- wanted to make the SFF social. We wentand had chinese food (meaning I had a very small dinner), then went out forpastries, and then went bowling. I had a good time, especially that I gotto interact a bit with a certain someone I like (alas, I'm both distant andthe feelings arn't as reciprocal as I'd like). It really was nice to havesomething like a good social circle again.. and I actually got a good amountof hugs and the kind of affection that friends share while with them..but then I got to thinking about two things.. that I don't have anything likethat here in Pgh, and the people there who were proper couples seemedso happy with each other. It says a lot about my life that I've had so littlephysical or emotional human contact for so long, and having a taste of thatonly reminds me of what I've been missing for so long. The community reallyhas some great people that know how to make other people feel wanted. More onthat later. Anyhow, we went back to the campus area, I got my car, and went toOutland. When I got there, it was quite alive, and I got some dancing in..Unlike before, I didn't actually seem to tire from dancing -- perhaps theweight loss (I'm down to 155 pounds at last check) and occasional exercise(bike rides to/from work, rock climbing, occasional running in the evening)have paid off. I saw a lot of people I haven't seen for a long time -- Jessica's (ex?) boyfriend (but not her), a girl who was trying to hit on meback when I came there regularly, various staff members, MathAdam, Dawon (whowas fairly drunk), Tim (was there again), and eventually Tom, who I went andgrabbed a meal with afterwards. Dancing really was a lot of fun, seeing allthe types of people.. it was interesting seeing the couples who danced --there were some of them who really knew how to show a lot of desire intheir motions.. There's fresh hints that Outland's days are numbered. *sigh*Again though, this connects back to the earlier theme, which makes it a themeof the weekend. Desire between people, and the connections between them. It'sbeen a very long time since I've really felt (desired by/connected to) anyonefor more than fleeting moments. This weekend I saw a lot of desire, of the love,of the sensual kind, and the circle-of-friends type, the last of which Ipartook of. That's part of what I think is the best stuff in life. Havingsome of even the friends-type made me feel like I was living someoneelse's life for a bit. Feeling wanted is just so foreign to my way oflife that it's a happiness that hurt. I could heal from wounds I've had so longthat I've gotten used to them if I had more access to that kind of feeling..So yes, I see what's wrong with my life thanks to a wonderful weekend whenwhat's wrong with my life wasn't as wrong as it normally is.
To finish the story (although the interesting insight I have is done), Ileft Columbus around 5am, drove about halfway home, and determined that Iwasn't awake enough to feel safe in driving the rest of the way, slept ata rest stop from 6 to 8, and then sleepily drove the rest of the way home.It's strange, how sleeping upright in a car leads almost universally toa 'different' sleep. I, na klar, had bad dreams, in this case, dreams ofdriving my car, crashing, and dying, over and over. I had trouble, in thedreams, telling if I was awake, partly because the dreams all started withmy driving from where I was at the rest station. When I finally woke up, Ireally was nervous that I wasn't really awake, and it took awhile to convincemyself to actually start to drive. I slept most of today, and to avoid totallameness, went to Coffee Tree from about 19:3 to 23:45. I met with Dmitry,and talked about digital cameras and the dating scene. He suggested I puta profile up on JDate, a Jewish-focusing dating service. I'm nottoo sure how I'd feel about that -- I'd feel weird, for example, putting aprofile up on a black-dating board, even if I happened to find people withthat ethnicity to be uniquely attractive, as I'm not black. More to the point,I imagine that the reason people use Jewish-centric dating services, asopposed to non-racial ones, is that they're looking to meet other people ofthe same race, so I'd be unlikely to be what said people would be looking for.On the other hand, it really couldn't hurt anything. I'll think about it.
Apparently, one of the techno songs I've been hoping to find is by a groupcalled "Levity", and I imagine the song title is something like"Pre-Millenial Tension", although google is powerless against its obscurity.If any of you know, or live in Columbus and can listen for the song at Outlandand ask for more info from the DJs, drop me an email. This sitehas lots of neat data, and is ambitious in what it tries to do with itsinterface (although to view it, I had to disable all kinds of security thingsin my browser)..
Finally, Mass has approved of gay marrage (sic). This is a good dayfor everyone, when conservativism takes another blow.I have other things to blog about, but they'll have to wait --my sleep patterns are presently really messed up.