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I collect ideas for dreams

Is this spirituality? Or the instincts of an improved ape?

I sometimes am still that young boy that I once was, staring at objects, willing them to move. I sometimes slip out of the house, if where I am living permits, to sing naked in the rain, ideally in the woods. I sometimes sit beneath a tree and feel a connectedness with things. I identify with an element of water, and dream that it will not harm me, and crave that rain, and immersion in water.

I am a rational person. I don't believe we are anything but atoms. No soul, no afterlife, no actual connections. Yet, we fit in nature and are part of a biosphere, and we retain our history, of course. We feel emotion at sunsets, at trees, valleys, epic landscapes. Science is a layer, it decides how I predict the events of the future. Philosophy is a layer, it helps decide the things I want and value, and put them to order. Yet when I don't think it forms dangerous habits-of-mind, I indulge some of these frivolties, superstitions, and undersupported hypotheses. I also feel free to use commonsense notions of things, especially but not only when science has not yet made a comprehensive theory in the area (e.g. psychology). I think we all do this to some extent.

Empiricism and what-i-call-good philosophy own much of who I am, but I see no significant conflict with these indulgences. Philosophical empiricism has not deadened my eyes nor stolen my poetry.


if the alchemical elements had personality types, i would pick water too. it's good for self-soothing, for example, when it's raining.